Don't get me wrong, I like old people. I even plan on being one myself one day. But please hear me those of you who are youth-challenged: if someone is standing in front of you in a car park, waving their hands to STOP, and asking you to reverse your car, it doesn't mean go forward.
The brake is the one in the middle, or possibly on the left if you have an automatic. It is NOT the one on the right (well, it possibly is if you are in a country other than Australia).
I have had a very bad year when it comes to cars. Things keep hitting me. First it was hail stones the size of walnuts that took out one side of the car. Then it was a caterer in a teeny little van who rear ended me on the way home from the shops - he took out the bumper and all the rear chassis.
Then, when my car was in the shop being fixed, my mum allowed me to drive her car. Two days later I was the front car in a three car pile up, where Mr P-Plater slammed into Ms Beetle and pushed her into Mum's Car.
Today as I was loading my car with some groceries, a little old lady in her old lady car attempted to park in my car space. It's the only explanation for why she ended up scraping the side of her car against my wheel rim (thank heavens for rubber rim protectors).
She didn't even seem to notice. Not even when I tapped on her bonnet and said 'Stop! You have hit my car, please reverse'. She began moving forward! This lady is why elderly drivers get a bad name.
I did keep my cool, which is a change. The last time someone hit me I yelled at them. The first time someone hit me I almost cried. This time I planted myself between my car and hers while she make her second attempt to park. In hindsight, perhaps that wasn't the wisest thing to do considering her dubious ability.
And after she parked, I watched her get out of the car and scurry away into the shops. Not a word, not an apology, not a care that she had damaged her car.
I let her go. My car was fine. But I didn't tell her she had parked illegally in a loading zone, so maybe karma will sort her out.