Can you hear that? That is the sound of a vacuum being run over the floorboards in my new upstairs extension.
That is the sound of being so close to the finishing line you can practically reach out and touch the ribbon, or at least the dude standing next to it with the stop watch and bored expression on his face.
I have not been writing about my ongoing saga with the renovations because it has been making me so angry I have developed a new personality. Funnily enough, this new person is someone I have always wanted to be.
I argue, plead, cajole, negotiate, articulate and am pushy on a scale that would scare the pageant mums with their coiffed and made up toddlers. I have surprised myself on a number of occasions, and regularly congratulate myself on my 'House Book' which contains every single conversation I have had with builders and tradies over the past two years, every colour decision we made, every fitting we ever chose. I have dates, names and figures in excruciating detail and it has saved my proverbial more times than I care to count.
I love my anal tendencies. I would thoroughly recommend them to anyone considering the renovation route.
This week the plastering was repatched (again), and the walls repainted (again). The sink was fixed. The splashback installed. The new TV aerial installed. The blinds were installed. On Friday - only three sleeps to go - the carpet will be installed.
Carpet - no more echoing floorboards and bits of plaster stuck between your toes. No more builders dust and the need to wear thongs every time you go upstairs. After the carpet goes down, we can move in! After the carpet goes down, there will be no more strange men in my house. A friend said the other day that doing renovations and having lots of strange men in the house must be like having unwanted house guests. Hit the nail on the head!
I have decided I love my carpet installer and he will be my new hero. If I ever have a boy-child I will name him after the carpet installer, because he represents to me the end of this very dirty, very expensive, very frustrating journey. The end is nigh, I can almost smell it. And it smells good!.